Fears??

Heyyyy Divas,

It's been a while. I truly apologize, its been over a month and mentally I have been all over the place and so has my weight.

I have not gained or lost any but my fear of not completing a goal or task for myself is unbearable.

As I sat and wrote this message for Afrodeezha, my fingers couldn't stop typing but I realized what I said is the truth, and I understand why I didn't met that 30lbs goal I sat for myself, because... simply put, I just wasn't ready. Please continue to read below.

Heyyyy Afrodeezha!!


Thank you for joining us.

I have been on such a high emotional roll coaster myself that I have been praying to get off of it and fast. With emotions high, we tend to eat things we are not suppose to. But wait here's the kicker we know we are not suppose to, so now we feel guilty and often times even cry.

I have learned that we are very critical human beings, when you tend to carry extra weight. We become so harder on ourselves than the size 2 chick standing in GAP trying on some jeans.

I believe before we can truly commit to a life style change of being healthy and thin, we first need to examine our emotional triggers. What makes us do what we do? Why do we feel the "need" to stray when we become bored or angry?

And Afrodeezha trust me, this part isn't easy. I am in this transition stage of my life, and I am re-examining everyone and everything. I am doing things for ME and not for anyone else. I am rediscovering this new person, and whether I have support or not, I know its something that needs to be done. If not..... I am on the road to gaining all 100 lbs I lost and my heart and soul WILL NOT be able to handle that.

I have an acronym for the word FAT- Its Feeling Absent Tremendously!!!

Please Listen to me, whether you are a size 6 or 26 you are BEAUTIFUL in your own right. We tend to become absent sometimes emotionally and spiritually and food takes it place (thats why we feel FAT or call ourselves FAT). So Hold your head high because someone didn't wake up this morning. Someone lost a leg, and can't workout at all. Or in memory of my Uncle that died of stomach cancer, whom couldn't eat a single thing for at least 2 years. So imagine that fried chicken we love so much, imagine smelling it but not able to eat it that was him. (R.I.P. Uncle JB. We love U!) Basically there are people that are a lot worst off then we are. We hold, Faith, strength, ambition, determination, and the WILL to live our lives as it is meant to be.

We may not be where we want to be yet for our ideal size and weight, but we have the WILL to make it happen. We just have to put in the work; mentally, physically, spiritually and emotionally. Once these paths are align our journey and quest will fall into place. TRUST ME! You are not ALONE!


~~Two Snaps~~